Ten Reasons the World Will NOT End in 2012

The world will Not End in the year 2012. I have interviewed several very famous and well known fictional mediums. And they all have told me that the world will not end in the year 2012.
The top ten reasons are below.
1. Microsoft is putting out a new version on windows in 2012. (We all know how well they keep a schedule)

2. The Cowboys will WIN the NFL Championship that year. That big crackling sound we will hear, will be Hell freezing over, not the world ending.
3. That Guy who wrote the Mayan Calender, well... He was a Cowboy fan.
4. They discovered that drinking red wine will make you live longer. I figure me will be around well into the next century.
5. Marissa Tomei will win an Academy Award in 2013. (Don't say It Couldn't Happen.)
6. An unknown virus will infect Washington DC and wipe out all the politicians, Who will survive?... We Will.
7. L Ron Hubbard hasn't scheduled the spaceship to get here until 2014.
8. There will still be plenty of comic books that haven't been made into bad movies.
9. The warranty on my new car will expire Jan 1 2013.
10. Christian Bales F-ing said it wouldn't.